I thought all day about what I wanted to post about this. Really, there are so very many reasons in my life to be thankful!
What I am truly thankful for tonight is those little moments that come in on the wings of...on the wings of...God's grace. Just a little thought that brushes up against the reality of what is going on today.
As I was walking Shasta this evening, the thought occured to me that I have probably never been my authentic self. Not totally. I have been held down by my own insecurities, other's unthinking comments, and downright unkind words by people who were supposed to love me. Not only is that sad, but how sad that I let that happen. And I did let that happen.
I hold no animosity towards them. It was my own decision to let these things become who I am. I'm 58 years old, and have no intention of being that small person any longer. My kids will struggle with that unless I am here to teach them. I will try to change that each and every day.
Yes, I am thankful for the insight.
Never too late to learn things about yourself. I wonder, however... How many people are really their 'authentic selves'?
ReplyDeleteOne of the sadnesses of life is when one does not feel able to be one's 'authentic self' for whatever reason. Ideally I think that everyone needs a Friend Who Knows Too Much to trust and enable one to realise who we are. But now that you have had the realisation I wish you well in grasping that which is yours by right: the right to be yourself. Good luck. Go well.
ReplyDeleteBravo my friend, bravo.
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